


more love, less war

by LiveLaughLovex



Series: tomorrow’s precious memories [4]
Category: Blue Bloods (TV)
Genre: F/M, Post 9.04 Blackout, Spoilers for 9.04 Blackout
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 17:28:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16351028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiveLaughLovex/pseuds/LiveLaughLovex
Summary: It was three o’clock in the morning when Eddie awoke to find the other side of the bed empty.Post 9.04, "Blackout." After the events in the park, Jamie and Eddie have an early morning heart-to-heart in the kitchen they now share.





	more love, less war

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly didn't think I'd be posting something for this episode, as I wrote something based on the promos, but damn. That episode was so good, and I'm not just talking about the Jamko storyline. I wrote this simply because I feel like there are some emotional moments we never see onscreen (case in point, where's our romantic mini-golf proposal?). I am also forever troubled by the fact that, in many years of partnership, we've never seen Jamie and Eddie really discuss what happened to Joe. This was born of my desire to see some scenes like that in the future. 
> 
> I will admit it's been months since I saw Joe's death episode, and most of what's written here either comes from fan-run information sites or my own brain. Anything completely off base, I'm going to go ahead and claim creative license. Sorry in advance if it annoys you. 
> 
> The idea behind the title comes from the quote, "All is fair in love and war." - John Lyly (I think). 
> 
> Obviously I don't own this show, or else these scenes would happen on the screen. I hope you enjoy!

It was three o’clock in the morning when Eddie awoke to find the other side of the bed empty, the sheets cool to the touch. She tossed aside the covers and climbed from the mattress, carelessly throwing a faded robe she’d had since college over the thin pajamas she wore. Then, with a deep inhale and an even larger exhale, she went in search of the man who’d vacated the bedroom at some point during the night.

It didn’t take her long to find her fiancé. Jamie was seated on a barstool at his kitchen counter, a half-empty glass of scotch balanced between his fingers as he stared absently at the open file on the table in front of him. Eddie knew the information it held without moving any closer. There were some things no member of the Reagan family seemed able to let go of. One of their own being willingly put in danger by a superior officer seemed to be near the top of the list.

She sighed quietly, leaning back against the living room wall with her arms crossed over her chest. “Babe, it’s the middle of the night,” she informed him tiredly. “Don’t you think it’s a little too early to be drinking?”

Jamie glanced up from the file to offer an indifferent shrug. “I haven’t gone to sleep yet, so it’s technically a nightcap.” He lifted the glass, swirling around the amber liquid in the process. “You want one?”

Eddie exhaled, pushing away from the wall. “Sure,” she agreed, accepting the glass he extended in her direction. “I can’t exactly let my fiancé drink alone in a dark apartment before the sun comes up, now can I? It’d be kind of depressing.”

Jamie cracked a smile that quickly faded at that. Silence fell over the room for a solid five minutes. When the man sitting next to her did speak again, the words leaving his mouth were not the ones she’d expected.

“I was in court the day my brother was killed.” Jamie took another sip of the amber liquid in front of him the moment he finished talking. “I honestly can’t even remember which client I was representing. I think it was a divorce case, something like that.” He scoffed, shaking his head. “I knew something was wrong before I even took the call. Erin’s number popped up on the screen, and she was the proud big sister, you know? Documented my cases in bright red ink on the calendar, always called me beforehand to wish me luck. She wouldn’t have called if it wasn’t important. Part of me knew right then that I’d be burying a brother the next week. I just wasn’t sure which one.”

He continued before Eddie could swallow the lump in her throat enough to speak. “Time of death has to be declared by a doctor. The paramedics on the scene couldn’t call it. But we all knew there’d be no saying goodbye. Joe was gone.” His voice trembled for a moment, forcing him to inhale deeply before continuing. “The worst part about it was finding out how he’d died.”

His bloodshot eyes met hers, and the pain she saw there was enough to freeze her in place before she could move to reach for his hand. “Eddie, they shot my brother in the back. They killed my best friend without even having even respect or decency to look him in the eye while they did it. One of the people responsible for what happened that day, the man who pulled the trigger, was my brother’s partner.”

Eddie drew in a deep breath as a hundred things started making sense at once. “A cop your brother trusted to have his back,” she concluded, causing Jamie to stare down defeatedly at his hands.

“Yeah,” Jamie agreed, clearing his throat. “Joe was a lot like you in some ways, you know. Thought just like you do, especially when it came to the job.”

“How so?” Eddie asked after a moment.

Jamie shrugged. “He always saw the world as black-and-white,” he explained. “And he always assumed that, when given the chance, people would do the right thing, simply because it was the right thing to do. It wasn’t a side of him we saw often. The streets of this city can harden even the most devout man, make him think there are fewer people worth saving than worth losing. But I never saw them do that to Joe. He lived by a code of honor stricter than my dad’s most days. The Blue Code was not something he believed in respecting, not if it meant hurting innocent people in the name of protecting a fellow officer. He was killed because, even in the end, he wanted nothing more than to do the right thing.”

“And he gave his life for the cause,” Eddie sighed, understanding the man next to her in a way she hadn’t before. They’d not discussed his brother’s death in detail, not even after he’d taken her to visit his missing family members at the cemetery. She was beginning to understand why he’d played it so close to the vest. It was a heavy burden to carry.

“Yeah,” Jamie agreed hollowly. “He did.” The sergeant sighed heavily as he glanced up from his hands and into her eyes. “It isn’t because I think you’re weak,” he told her seriously. “Or because I’m your overprotective sergeant who just so happens to be planning on spending my life with you. It’s because the last time someone I considered family did the right thing for all the right reasons, he did it with the wrong guy watching his back. Because of that, my nephew learned at five years old what Taps sounds like with bagpipes.”

“Jamie,” Eddie breathed quietly, her hand coming to cover his on the counter. “I can’t promise I’m not going to get shot, and I’m not going to sit here and lie to you. You and I don’t do that to each other.”

“No,” Jamie agreed. “We don’t.”

“Yeah,” Eddie returned. “I was scared tonight.”

“What?” Jamie asked confusedly. “You were?”

“Of course I was,” she sighed. “I read the same files you did, Jamie. Hell, I’m the one who came up with the connection that attracted Davis’ attention. I knew what could happen, and for a split second, when he had me pinned down and I couldn’t defend myself, I was absolutely terrified he was going to do to me what he’d done to them. That’s the honest truth.”

“Were you scared before you left?” he asked quietly, groaning when she nodded once. “Then why’d you go, Eddie? If you didn’t trust Davis to watch your back, why’d you take the risk?”

Eddie shrugged her shoulders. “I grew up in a gated community,” she explained. “Didn’t get my first taste of the real world till I got to the Ivy League. Even there, the worst thing that ever happened to me was what Skip and his buddies did. It was awful, but considering what happened to other girls on campus, other girls that lived in the building with me…” She shrugged a single shoulder. “In a lot of ways, I got off easy.”

“Sexual harassment isn’t getting off easy, Eddie,” Jamie reminded her. “What those jerks did to you was not at all okay.”

“I know that,” Eddie assured him. “But they were far from the worst guys walking around on that campus. Of course, those guys had fancy trust funds and lawyers who didn’t care whether or not they were guilty as long as they saw a fat paycheck from Daddy. I saw a lot of guys like the bastard we caught today get away with even worse while I was at Yale. I couldn’t stand by over a decade later and let it happen to another group of innocent girls. Not when I had the ability to stop it.”

Jamie stared absently at his empty glass for a moment before speaking. “What you said to me at dinner the other night, about being scared of becoming a victim while walking to your car in the middle of the night…”

Eddie sighed. “You know how sometimes, back when we were partners, I’d call you randomly at midnight or one in the morning?”

“You still do that,” Jamie pointed out. “It’s just not to make small talk anymore. Now, it’s to buy milk.”

Eddie cracked a smile at that. “Yes, it is. Don’t you love how domestic we’ve become?” She continued before he could answer the question. “I was never making small talk, Jamie. I mean, to your muddled brain in the middle of the night, that’s probably what it felt like, but...” She hesitated for a moment before finishing the thought. “I called you. When I walked home in the middle of the night after a few drinks, I called you and stayed on the line with you until I was at my apartment.”

“You never told me that,” Jamie accused quietly, his tone making it clear he wasn’t actually angry.

“No,” Eddie agreed. “I didn’t. I didn’t want to put that on you. Nothing ever happened, so it wasn’t something you needed to know. But if something had happened to me, the way something happened to those girls, I knew exactly who I wanted to have my back. And I’m still putting my faith in you, Jameson Reagan. You are still the person I call when I want to feel safe.”

Jamie lifted their joint hands to his mouth and pressed a kiss to her fingers, allowing her to speak.

“I was really glad when you showed up tonight,” she told him softly. “I know, what with the marching off and everything, it probably didn’t seem like it, but…” She shook her head. “You were right about Davis,” she told him after a moment. “He offers me another gig, I’m going to turn it down. But it’s not because of you,” she added before he could even open his mouth. “It’s because I don’t think he’s the kind of cop I want to trust.”

“Okay,” Jamie replied with a single nod.

“Thank you for being my backup today,” she sighed as she rested her head on his shoulder.

“Well, you told me a few weeks ago you don’t want our vows to just be words on paper,” Jamie reminded her. “I’m going to do everything in my power to keep that from happening. Being your backup’s just part of the deal, babe.”

“Our army of two,” she recited, her eyes sliding closed as exhaustion took over.

She felt Jamie’s smile as he pressed his lips to the top of her head. “Yeah,” he agreed softly. “You and me, till death do us part.”

“Sounds good,” she mumbled against the collar of his tee shirt.

“Yeah, Ed. It sounds great.”

 

 


End file.
